Preamble
I was planning to not write for a while because my determination bar was running down ⌛.
I was feeling very discouraged and was trying to keep my bar up.
I am sure I am not the only one feeling this way.
I made a Podcast recently on disappointment.
The Great Thing About Disappointment.
Let us ride into the topic. . ..
You should give it when I ask for it
I have a problem with people who cannot say ‘please’ or be polite. My body always shrinks in disgust when I am with such people. I get very irritated by rude people. I cannot hide it even if I try.
The thought pattern that makes people feel they can get whatever they want even when they do not have the right is very mean.
I wonder if they think the world was made only for them.
I gave myself the job of correcting those who make it a habit to demand for things that are not theirs (when it applies to me)
You can’t do that baby. It ain’t yours
You should not demand for things when you should ask for them with politeness, unless you are a bully.
And not everyone is timid.
Nothing you’re saying makes sense. ..
More like blah blah blah
Explain yourself a million times, yet you are saying nbghigfr. Simple nonsense!
Why?
Because you ain’t going their way.
I find that disrespectful.
It is normal to disagree with people you have chemistry with.
What signifies respect is when none of you try to push your perspective into the other’s throat.
You have your lane, they have theirs. If you think they are stupid, you cannot do much about it. They will understand when they wish to.
Truth
There were times I tried so hard to make the other person see my point of veiw and I found out it was not working, a simple let it go was my approach. It saved my little strength.
I also believe that pushing beliefs should have its boundaries.
You have a boundary, the other person has a boundary.
Respect that!
You can share your opinions without being forceful either in words or in the tone of your words.
Your gentleness and thoughtfulness will pass your message better.
Even when you think that your advice is helpful, disregarding the other person’s feeling is just wrong and will not help you pass any message. You will only push the person away.
Whenever you are trying to give an advice. Come from the other person’s point of veiw first. That helps you empathize with them and helps you understand where they are coming from. After this process, you can give advice in respect to individual personalities.
But I got to say the truth and the truth hurts. What I do?
What you know? (not a mistake)
Saying the truth does not mean you have to say it without common sense.
What is the use of your truth if it won’t do anything?
The truth you share should not be wasted and you achieve that by thinking of what and how you share.
Some people be spilling truth and ruining people because they think they sharing truth but the truth they share is truth they won't recieve....
A simple question: If you were in their shoes, how would you feel?
This question will help us to be more kind.
It is true it is hard to understand people at times.
Because humans be complex
But courtesy is knowing when to stop, and when to continue.
If you cannot understand, and the explanation is not tangible, and the matter is not life threatening, you would not gain anything by pushing it.
Except pushing the person away
I only care how I feel
Yes baby!
The rest of the world can sulk!
It is easier to know how we feel than what another person feels, and when we do not appreciate how another person feels, we tend to trample on their feelings because that is not how we feel.
O. R. A
You get?
And what I find very mean is when your feelings are disregarded and the other person feels they are right for disregarding your feelings.
They be like: Don’t complain
And if you are someone who always feels like it is always your fault, you will be consistently attacked with that (just be prepared because it is your fault!)
Expressing our feelings should not disregard another perosn’s feelings.
A disagreement should not evolve into a disconnection.
Therefore because you are not feeling that way should not mean another person cannot feel that way.
Who gave you the right over another person’s feelings?
It takes a lot to be kind but its ripple effect is always greater.
Being kind is art that is mastered by character practice.
Know your rights. Know what is not.
Your rights include:
- Food
- Water
- Education
- Choice of religion
- Housing
- Political choices
- Life
Maybe they are not arranged well and there are a lot to probably add but I leave them here. Add the ones you know in the comment section below.
What is not your right:
- Access to someone’s property
- Access to someone’s art
- Access to other people’s belongings
- Access to what is not yours! ! !!!
It is not yours, it is not your right.
You need permission.
Permission has it’s process.
If you cannot follow the process, kindly back off and stop demanding.
It aint yours in the first place
I repeat: If you cannot follow the process to get it then back off!! !!
Do not come demanding like it is your right.
When it isn’t.
Don’t take me for granted
Stomping your feet on the ground can hurt
More like
Standing your ground needs confidence.
It can hurt because you try to appear tough when you be crumbling inside with tears. .
More like: why? ??😭😭😭😭
Why you making me be too tough?
But you have to.
You have to stand your ground when you have to.
It is easy to get disrespectful of those we are fond of because familiarity breeds contempt.
It happens.
And if you keep letting it slide, there will come a time when you will slide away with it….
Standing on your ground may make you appear proud but that is one hit you be prepared to take because it will come.
When you are being cajoled to go against your standards, make sure to stand your grounds.
If they don’t respect your standards now, they may never do.
O. R. A
Maybe it’s my mother’s influence but I cannot help but stand my ground.
Especially towards those who insist in trying to bend me to their will. They always get the wall response.
Don’t go there! !
In a culture that encourages bullying, it takes a lot of effort to make sure you don’t lose your originality trying to please as many people as you can.
Everyone you meet has principles on how they live their lives, it is either you emulate them or you don’t but that option should be a choice you willingly make not one that you are bullied into making.
Today’s post is made.
I thought I would write more 😅😅😅😅
I actually thought I would write none but I did write long notes 😅😅😅😅
A lot of pictures today, I guess I had to share this. .
Anyway, add more on this post in the comment section.
What you think I miss?
#fromamedicalstudentfaraway
Deeperlook 