Evolution of a solitary being………
Evolution is the process of evolving. It is the process of transformation.
Arts used in this series are part of DISCOVERY a project I started in August on Instagram. A collection of abstract arts with different titles despicting my thoughts on certain matters.
Some of them would be shared here, and the rest can be found on instagram via my profile onyirose12.
This series will be concluded with a documentary that would be shared here via Youtube.
Hoping to have you watch it then.
MEANING
A cavewoman is one who has lived in a shell of personality for as long she has known.
She is defined by emotions and remaining hidden.
Emotions
Emotions differ and unless a person is apathic, our emotions depend on triggering factors, good or bad.
She is one who has allowed her emotions control her perception and though her emotions are not always wrong, they have not always been reliable.
For some of us, we are able to let go of emotions and do what needs to be done.
In summary your emotions rarely sway you.
For some of us, our emotions tug at us with ferociousity until we either win or yield.
It is a consistent struggle to either yield to what we are feeling or do what needs to be done.
The thoughts often move like this:
What would the person think?
How would the other person feel?
What would happen afterwards?
How would I deal with this situation in the best way possible?
Did I do well enough?
Did I do bad?
What perception has been registered about me?
How do I coordinate myself in such a way that I do not loose myself in the process?
These thoughts are constant in almost every relationship that the cavewoman experiences.
They are the dilemma that swirl teasingly no matter hard they tried to be ignored
Noticing the tiniest expressions, the movement of the hands, the sigh of the lips, the tone in the voice, the response to questions, all of these details and more are often observed most times without sharing but analzying within.
The desire to keep emotions at the right place is a consistent concern for the cavewoman and hence her response to the outside is often an irony.
If she tells you everything she observed yet refused to say, it would be a surprise.
The muddling of emotions but the concern of perception may make the cavewoman share her emotions in a muddled way.
It often comes out differently than what you may expect.
If you are not willing to know why. You won't.
Remaining hidden
You won’t know unless she lets you know
Unless you know her
Unless she allows you to know her
This ability to keep within and letting those who have proven to be safe inside is one of the important characteristics of the cavewoman.
It doesn’t matter what you do, if you are not deemed safe, the barrier is set for you.
🏗
If you desire to know the cavewoman, then you need to be safe.
Safe
Being safe depends on what she deems as safe.
Safety first
Remaining hidden also involves the beauty of controlling noise in the enviroment. When unable to control noise, it can trigger and set her ablaze.
However, in life there are many things that we cannot always control.
Many
Cavewoman or Cavew(hu)man
I am one used to solitude. It affords me the opportunity to filter my thoughts, my relationships and create a balance on my decisions.
This does not mean that I do not value human relationship, communication or even company.
I do.
I do a lot.
A lot
Recently, I have been researching more and discovered certain things that have explained certain things.
The truth is that nobody can fully discover themselves or another person. The only who has that ability is God.
He searches the heart.
If you have never taken a personality test especially the one made by Meyer and Briggs, I encourage you to do so. I have taken it more than five times and got the same result.
The result explained many things, and described me very well.
Amazing right?
And then I also took another test and it confirmed many other things.
Well, I know some people may think that the tests are unreliable. However, if they describe you better than another human has done before, I do not think there is a harm analyzing it.
Discovering yourself helps you understand why you respond to certain things.
Why certain relationships are more important to you and others are not.
Why you have certain values and why they are important to you.
Why you have the goal you have and why you are willing to achieve it.
It allows you understand why certain things have happened the way they did and why you responded that way.
As I continue in my journey of discovering who God has made me to be, I am willing to let go of things that have not allowed me to grow.
It also a journey of coming to a place of honesty with myself and the ways I have interacted with humans in the world.
This interaction is not only physical but includes the dilemma I have had to face when presenting myself.
The conflict I have had to face because I allowed certain notions grow in my mind and thus created internal environments that did not allow me be completely sincere and honest with myself.
In order to appreciate what God has been doing, I have to accept the corrections He has been giving and forgive myself and allow myself to heal from wounds inflicted by others and myself.
In this journey, I am learning that I will lose hope if I do not hang unto God.
God has been the best anchor and would always be. Amen
This process of evolution I am going through is because God started it and He will finish it.
Psalms 139:14 I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well. (King James Version)
If you were wondering the results of the test, here they are:
INFJ and a HSP
I mentioned HSP alot, it means a highly sensitive person. As much as labels are not my thing, understanding your personality helps you interact with your society, yourself and do better.
With the Holy Spirit helping me, I am able to allow my weakness and strength be submitted to God’s will. Amen.
Click here to take the Personality test.
Note
To get the artwork used in this series, check the ART page under the digital option.
Or better still, you can go directly to the Digital option HERE.
Some of the topics I have shared appear repeated. This is not because I do not have topics to share, but because there is always more no matter how many times it has been shared.
This is way of exploring the diversity I am experiencing as they happen and also affords you, the reader the opportunity to experience it too.
See you in the next part of this series.
If you are undergoing evolution, how is it?
Still…
#fromamedicalstudentfaraway
Deeperlook 